Understanding

I feel that not many people understand me, maybe there are the rare few, but still MAJORITY don't. They never understand what I do, and the reasons behind my actions. Or maybe I shouldn't blame them, because I never told them these stuff. Or maybe I shouldn't expect too much from other people, as the more I hope for, the more I disappoint myself. A lot of people think I am a happy-go-lucky person, in reality, I'm just the opposite. A lot of people don't dare to tell me secrets, because they think I will announce their secrets to the world. I am exactly opposite of what you think I am.

You know, best friends who understand you to the extent that he/she knows how many wisdom tooth you currently have, are so rare. They are in the verge of extinction. I am not complaining, as I have a nice number of best friends who take care of me, and a nice number of friends who can talk to me whenever I needed them. In all, I am just talking trash in this post.

Before I was 21, I have a very big problem with myself --- I thought I don't have any good traits, as in, none. I thought I was a total failure, I get depressed for no reason, I don't like my life, I study as hard as possible, vainly thinking I can get into Stanford. I think my brain grew up a little now. :D I think I have good traits too. Haha. Good traits which not even my bestest friends could tell me. I won't say it out loud here, but it's up to you to decide what good traits I have. I shouldn't complain so much about life after all. I have A LOT of things that people crave for during their entire lifetime. I have almost everything anybody can ask for, well, minus some "minor complications". But, my point is, I want to tell myself that, I should be grateful for the things I own right now. 21 years is quite a short time to have acquired this level of "success". :D Or maybe I too easily contented.... Maybe....